smogon, help me out: ever dropped out of uni?

[Feathers]

some of you may remember my last thread related to this, wherein i asked about the possibility of moving out and going to school full time/working (my uni has no res). i got some excellent answers and so i'm hoping i might be able to get some good advice or stories of your experience.

in the last thread i explained that my living situation was not favorable, but i decided that i would be okay for the four years it would take to complete my schooling, giving me a chance to do some traveling while it's still cheap, among other reasons.

my first year is complete, but things have gotten worse and i'm probably near the end of my rope. i began therapy to see if it would help me, and while it has helped with personal problems, it hasn't changed anything in the long run (of course) so really when i decided i needed therapy was probably when i should have actively began to think about this.

essentially the only way for me to be able to afford to move out would be to stop going to school and start working full-time. i'm paying rent living at home and it isn't saving me anything because i can only work two days a week.

now... leaving school is not something i ever thought i would consider. i value what i have and i did work hard to get accepted into my school, and i want to complete my degree... but things just aren't going well and i feel that at this point my mental and emotional health are more important. i have definitely been feeling the effects and i really am suffering for it. my therapist compared me to cinderella before i had even told her half my story, if that tells you anything.

so what is it like dropping out of school, and potentially never going back (for your personal reasons, or maybe someone else')? did it give you problems later in life? was it really the best thing for you or did it do more harm than good? did you ever end up going back?

i am currently waiting on feedback for my internship, which i should get soon. i was asked if i would be ok moving to california in case i end up with disney, and depending on the circumstances and chances of getting a job there i probably would not come back. my other potential jobs are with local companies however. so the internship could be a way out, but regardless i would still have to drop school.

so what do you have to suggest? life experience is definitely something i value in this case

 

[Dozz]

Well, I did something similar, it's not at quite the same level, but, it might give you some food for thought, so I'll post it

I don't know how much you know about the UK schooling system, but after the compulsory upto 16, you can choose what you fancy. I was basically shoehorned into taking A-Levels at my schools sixth form. These are totally academic, and are the main indicators for what Uni you can go to over here. I started my first year of them, and essentially, hated them so I ended up spending more time calling out senior staff and such, causing massive social problems. I went back for my second year, but, it was too much for me, and I ended up, dropping out. I started to try and find work, but kept up a half arsed level of study, just incase. Nowhere would touch me with a ten foot shitty stick, and after two months, I ended up returning to the place I hated so much only kept sane by my friends, changing half my courses, and trying to grind out some results for the year.

It didn't work, I never really recovered from the two months out, and I ended up with a set of piss poor grades. I finished school, and took a year out to count my chickens again. I only got a job based on sharing my Dad's surname and piggy backing his reputation for a bit. I ended up finding a course I liked. Nothing related to my A-Levels, and after slogging my guts out to get a quality portfolio together, that's what I'm doing now. It wasn't fun though. I still essentially feel lucky, and know I could have made it so much easier by just staying in school at 17. It piled on so much stress it was unreal.

If there's anything to take from my story, I guess it's think before you make any big decisions, although it might solve one problem, it can cause another, equally stressful one. I know that having gaps in my education was a massive problem, and a major cause of stress and disorder in my life for over two years.

 

[Feathers]

If there's anything to take from my story, I guess it's think before you make any big decisions, although it might solve one problem, it can cause another, equally stressful one. I know that having gaps in my education was a massive problem, and a major cause of stress and disorder in my life for over two years.

this is exactly why i'm looking for outside perspective, thanks for contributing.

i feel like i'm at a standstill. i'm not struggling with classes but living with my family is getting to be too much for me and i don't really have anywhere else to go. i would love to just move out and stay with other family members but the only good ones i have left are in edmonton. ):

i feel like stress is a major factor for me. for two days recently i was the only one in my house and it was the calmest i'd been in probably years.

 

[Fishy]

i dropped out of my university after i finished my second year. it wasn't really anything i had planned for, but i had a chance to spend a summer elsewhere with some friends hopefully diving into some videography related work and generally enjoying some time away from home, or anyone i really knew actually. it was definitely enriching, and exhilarating. it felt SO good to be working and sleeping elsewhere that wasn't a home to any of my family members as well, and was essentially the first i was living somewhere away from home. i commuted to school whilst attending.

now, i still haven't gone back to school. i stopped going after i finished my second year in 2011. i was going for psychology, but after i got to my second year courses i realized i wasn't really interested in maintaining this degree, or doing any of the things my classes required to earn that degree. thing is now, i really have no idea WHAT i want to do, but i do want to return to school. i'm just not going to put any more time/money into it until i absolutely know what i want to study, and what sort of degree i want to really work hard for.

school isn't going to make or break your future. attending university gives you the "qualifications" that businesses or companies look for to approve you for work. you should do what is going to make you happy! if you're stressed out at home and stressed at school, you need to make a change. dropping out of school now doesn't mean you can't ever return, or take online classes or do whatever the hell else to earn a degree nowadays. really, the only thing you're forfeiting from yourself is the standard "college experience," and you certainly don't need that to achieve a degree, no matter your age or current sitch. just do what feels right for you!

 

[X5Dragon]

Didn't see the last topic, but since your in a country with probably a million dozen majors and different programs, and you actually have a chance to attend a uni then I suggest you embrace this opportunity.

There is no rule that you have to finish college in 4/5 years, also you don't have to major in the first years. If the internship is in something that you absolutely love and won't regret doing it for a long time, then go for it.

In any case not everyone has to go to college, but having an extended high school like experience is always fun. GL.

 

[Lanturn314]

Well, I wasn't going to tell anyone this who wasn't a close friend, but I guess I might as well share my experience here because it really might help you.

During my junior and senior years of college, I struggled with severe depression due to personal problems, mostly due to the deaths of relatives but also due to other things, and thus couldn't really concentrate on much or do as well in classes as I should have been able to. It got worse and worse as time went on. I started getting counselling spring of my junior year, and went on antidepressants, but my personal life was getting extremely bad, and therapy and antidepressants just weren't enough. I stuck it out for another semester, and even tried to continue through this semester, which would have been my last semester.

However, my therapist told me that taking a medical leave of absence for this sort of thing was an option, and so I decided to do that. Currently, I'm living back home, just getting therapy and recovering. It's not the same as dropping out completely, because they'll let me back once they clear me as mentally healthy enough to return. I'm probably going back in the fall, and if not, i'll go back during the spring of next year to complete my degree.

The leave of absence thing might also be an option for you. It would give you the chance to try to work things out or see how things unfold in the real world with your own place and a job (though you'd probably be required to get therapy depending on the rules of your institution). You'd also be able to save up to be able to afford to live away from home while still going to school if you're smart with your money. And it would make it really easy to go back to the school you worked hard to get into, whether or not the living away from home thing works out. So if this sounds like a good idea, you should probably talk to your counsellor and see if this could really work for you.

Also, it's usually cheaper if you find a roommate to live with, so maybe try craigslist and look through personals in your local newspaper.

 

[cookie]

school isn't going to make or break your future. attending university gives you the "qualifications" that businesses or companies look for to approve you for work. you should do what is going to make you happy! if you're stressed out at home and stressed at school, you need to make a change. dropping out of school now doesn't mean you can't ever return, or take online classes or do whatever the hell else to earn a degree nowadays. really, the only thing you're forfeiting from yourself is the standard "college experience," and you certainly don't need that to achieve a degree, no matter your age or current sitch. just do what feels right for you!

Doing what might make you feel better now isn't necessarily what's good for you in the long run. I think the value of a degree here is being understated: sure, it's not impossible to get a job or do something with your life without one, but bloody hell it will make things hard. Not all of us will be presented with the opportunities that allow us to readily veer off the tried-and-tested path of getting a degree and a job. (pretty much echoing what Dozz said, his post was good)

You need to seriously think about whether university will get better for you, and the odds of you returning to it if you quit now. It might be that if you drop out you're just going to fall into a rut and bar a miracle never get out of it. I had some trouble at university during my first year, and considered transferring somewhere else. I stuck it out, made an effort to change things about myself and most importantly stopped worrying too much. I also went to counselling (which you have already done, which is good) which also helped. In my final year things are fine now. Do think about taking a leave of absence with the intention of returning: in hindsight I wasn't ready for university when I started and some sort of gap year may have helped to get my shit together.

 

[Feathers]

There is no rule that you have to finish college in 4/5 years, also you don't have to major in the first years. If the internship is in something that you absolutely love and won't regret doing it for a long time, then go for it.

i can't apply for my major (illustration) until my second year anyway. the internships are really something that could change where i am now and i would almost give anything to get them. i have the possibility of getting one with EA games (not the best company to work for, but gaming is my passion), one with dreamworks, or one with disney animation (the one that would require moving to california if it becomes a possibility). after handing in my portfolio to someone he decided he wanted to buy one of my paintings but i'm still waiting to hear back. i'm hoping that means good things.

@lanturn thanks so much for sharing, i honestly hadn't considered taking a medical leave. just goes to show how frazzled i am about this whole thing. i had actually meant to take a year off after high school to get some money in the bank, but after i was accepted i didn't want to skip out because someone else looking at my portfolio a year later might have different results. i will consult and see if this is a possibility for me.

i have plenty of friends who would love to move out with me, thankfully, and all of them are lucky enough to be inheriting money so i know they would be stable to live with at least. i just have to get stable myself.

You need to seriously think about whether university will get better for you, and the odds of you returning to it if you quit now. It might be that if you drop out you're just going to fall into a rut and bar a miracle never get out of it. I had some trouble at university during my first year, and considered transferring somewhere else. I stuck it out, made an effort to change things about myself and most importantly stopped worrying too much. I also went to counselling (which you have already done, which is good) which also helped. In my final year things are fine now. Do think about taking a leave of absence with the intention of returning: in hindsight I wasn't ready for university when I started and some sort of gap year may have helped to get my shit together.

this is one of my problems. i don't know if i'll fall into that rut and i know i don't want to. the medical leave is something i really will look into. i am very ready to continue my education, but my family is really making things almost impossible. this year was probably the most stressed i have ever been and it really reflected in my work and in my personality.

 

[Firestorm]

Does Emily Carr let you take classes part-time? Also, if you didn't have to pay rent at home, wouldn't you then be able to pay rent for on your own as long as you were sharing with others + living outside Vancouver proper? After all, you already live fairly outside the city so I feel like something in Richmond, Burnaby, New West, etc. would probably work better for you than where you are now. Of course there are other bills to pay as well.

Also look at student loans and bursaries. After all, you aren't thinking of dropping out due to school not being for you. If you're enjoying your education and it's the home life that's what's getting to you, I think you should be fixing that instead. If you drop school to work full time, I'm not sure if you'll be able to switch back as easily. Co-ops / Internships will also help save up money.