I'll be attempting to stray away from my usual competitive article submissions for once and try something more on the entertainment side. So basically, I was thinking about which moves could be talked about in terms of how they'd be helpful in real life. Note that all of this assumes that the person them self can use the move, not a Pokemon that they own. Here's a list of moves I've come up with in no particular order as of yet, and if anyone has suggestions for other moves, I'm all ears:
Introduction:
Attract:
Have you ever had trouble asking a girl out on a date before? Does your love for her burn hotter than 1,000 Volcaronas using Fiery Dance while her hatred towards you is as cold as a Regice using Icy Wind? Does she turn you down again, and again, and again, no matter how many times you ask her out, or how much you stalk her? Then say hello to the ultimate guy-laying tool in existence: Attract! From now on, you'll never have to deal with getting rejected in the harshest of ways; instead, you need only use Attract on the woman of choice, and just like that, that girl that once leered at you with murderous intent is now head over heels for you, and is eager to please! You can go to the movies with her, and she won't slap you if you put your arm behind her. You can drink from the same smoothie as her and she won't go to the hospital for a stomach pumping. You can even kiss her on the cheek without her trying to wash her face with acid. And don't even get me started about how things go in bed. Just remember to be near her at all times, otherwise the effect will ware off, and I do mean all times. Like always. Seriously dude, she'll remember all the things you did to her, and when that happens, you can say goodbye to little Jimmy.
Mind Reader
Pay Day
Psychic:
You're in your room watching TV, and you're a complete couch potato. Your rear end is firmly planted into the couch, and you don't want to disturb the harmony between the two. Suddenly, your stomach grumbles, and you suddenly feel the urge to get the bag of chips on the table in from of you. But as everyone whose been a lazy bum would know, it's too far away to reach without getting up, and you don't want to commit the couch potato's sin of having to get up and reach the food with effort. So what do you do? Just use Psychic and you'll be able to grab those chips, even if they were on the other side of the room, so your laziness now knows no bounds! Need the salt when you go out to lunch with a friend? Don't ask for your friend to give it to you, just use Psychic to grab it yourself! How about when you're carrying your backpack and your shoulders start hurting because the straps are digging into them? Just use Psychic to carry it around, and cut your back some slack! Need to grad your ringing phone but can't get it? You know what to do! The only drawback to using Psychic is that prolonged use leaves you with a killer migraine, so use with caution.
Teleport
Fly
Rest
Roar
Bulk Up
Slack Off
Conclusion:
And yes, this article will be for Issue 36 of The Smog.
Introduction:
Attract:
Have you ever had trouble asking a girl out on a date before? Does your love for her burn hotter than 1,000 Volcaronas using Fiery Dance while her hatred towards you is as cold as a Regice using Icy Wind? Does she turn you down again, and again, and again, no matter how many times you ask her out, or how much you stalk her? Then say hello to the ultimate guy-laying tool in existence: Attract! From now on, you'll never have to deal with getting rejected in the harshest of ways; instead, you need only use Attract on the woman of choice, and just like that, that girl that once leered at you with murderous intent is now head over heels for you, and is eager to please! You can go to the movies with her, and she won't slap you if you put your arm behind her. You can drink from the same smoothie as her and she won't go to the hospital for a stomach pumping. You can even kiss her on the cheek without her trying to wash her face with acid. And don't even get me started about how things go in bed. Just remember to be near her at all times, otherwise the effect will ware off, and I do mean all times. Like always. Seriously dude, she'll remember all the things you did to her, and when that happens, you can say goodbye to little Jimmy.
Mind Reader
Pay Day
Psychic:
You're in your room watching TV, and you're a complete couch potato. Your rear end is firmly planted into the couch, and you don't want to disturb the harmony between the two. Suddenly, your stomach grumbles, and you suddenly feel the urge to get the bag of chips on the table in from of you. But as everyone whose been a lazy bum would know, it's too far away to reach without getting up, and you don't want to commit the couch potato's sin of having to get up and reach the food with effort. So what do you do? Just use Psychic and you'll be able to grab those chips, even if they were on the other side of the room, so your laziness now knows no bounds! Need the salt when you go out to lunch with a friend? Don't ask for your friend to give it to you, just use Psychic to grab it yourself! How about when you're carrying your backpack and your shoulders start hurting because the straps are digging into them? Just use Psychic to carry it around, and cut your back some slack! Need to grad your ringing phone but can't get it? You know what to do! The only drawback to using Psychic is that prolonged use leaves you with a killer migraine, so use with caution.
Teleport
Fly
Rest
Roar
Bulk Up
Slack Off
Conclusion:
And yes, this article will be for Issue 36 of The Smog.
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